The Women in My Life


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Most people believe that “women are impossible to understand”. I wasn’t one of such people. If you have 7 sisters plus several aunties with whom you relate very well, you’re bound to learn a thing or two about how they think, act and/or react to certain situations. Before my third year in the university though, I hadn’t realised that I could “very easily” interact with girls until my colleague SOCIOSO Executive started calling me “ladies man”, reason being that the girls seemed to be comfortable around me.

I won’t be talking about any girl in particular, but I will throw a couple of random “descriptions”; of girls I have personally encountered as well as those I’ve seen in the lives of some of my close friends. If you’re a female (especially my friends) and reading this, try and find yourself in the descriptions. I could very well be referring to you. Guys, do you know any such girls? Let’s go:

There’s that girl you crush on. You don’t know her well, you barely see her but you just like her.

There’s that cute girl who calls herself names like “church girl” and “Jesus freak”

There’s that girl who says she loves you but you know she’ll be dating someone else in two weeks. When it doesn’t work she’ll come back though.

There’s that girl who you’re always rude to but she’ll be the first to call you.

There’s that crazy girl who calls you crazy but you both know she’s the crazy one.

There’s that girl who’s absolutely totally vain. She thinks everything is about her.

There’s that girl who will break up with you because of where you’re from.

There’s that girl who only calls when she needs something.

There’s that girl who you totally click with but already has a boyfriend.

There’s that girl who is mad about you but you’re just not feeling it.

There’s that girl who just wants to spend time with you.

There’s that girl who you always quarrel with.

There’s that crazy girl who won’t date you but wants you to date her sister.

There’s that girl who can’t take a compliment.

There’s that girl who you can connect with intellectually.

There’s that girl you barely see but whenever you see her, its like she never left.

There’s that girl who is in the wrong body.

There’s that girl who you dream about but have never met.

There’s that girl who went to abrokyire and forgot all about you.

There’s that girl who you never met physically but she is bae

There’s that girl who can’t bring herself to go to church.

There’s that girl who you have loved to marry but you both don’t believe in the same things.

There’s that girl who broke your heart.

There’s that girl who couldn’t wait for you.

There’s that crazy girl who is dying to see you date her best friend.

There’s that girl who you wish you had met sooner

There’s that girl who is still cute after 12years when you met her in JSS.

There’s that girl who gets on your every nerve.

There’s that girl who is always looking for money from you.

There’s that girl with the angelic voice.  O_O

There’s that loud girl that draws too much attention to herself

There’s that girl who can’t stop talking!!!!!

There’s that girl who makes you laugh so hard.

There’s that girl who your friend is dating but is always flirting with you.

There’s that girl who is not a girl at all.

There’s that black beauty that makes your heart skip a beat. EVERYTIME.

There’s that girl who has become unconsciously flirty because her workplace is dominated by men.

There’s that girl who loves food.

There’s that girl who is shy of you. She will give anything to not look you in the eye.

There will always be that girl who will claim she didn’t find herself in this piece.

I could go on but it’s almost 6 and my lights could go off any second. Thanks to ECG, my laptop is now a desktop.

So ladies, dig in there! Which of these descriptions best suits you? If you don’t see yourself in any of the descriptions, please read it again. :-p

Guys, have you met all these girls in your lifetime?



The fact that there are this many descriptions doesn’t necessarily mean there are this many girls. One girl could embody several of the above mentioned descriptions.



Daily Ghanaian Occurrences- Love Brewed in the African Pot.


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One time one of my uncles accused me of being “grandma’s favorite grandson”. His reason was this; they had been home together all day but she (grandma) hadn’t bothered to cook. No, not till I arrived. ” ‘Oye nii? meni obaa ye?’ she asked and proceeded to the kitchen to cook” he narrated. I simply smiled and continued eating my food. I wasn’t going to let him spoil it for me.

I am of this notion that Love is inextricably linked with food. If you do not share this view I suppose it is because your grandma never prepared food for you to eat. Anyway, I am not here to talk about my grandma’s many exploits as a chef of choice.

As I begun doing recently, I am here to share experiences, not from a trotro today though, but from a……. lets call it “food joint” for lack of a proper classification.

This kind of food joint is very typical in Ghanaian society. They are scattered across the capital as well as regional capitals and big towns and cities in the country. They take the form of kiosks that are partially covered with mosquito nets and a square outlet of some sort in the front where the vendor can hand over food to her customers. In a few instances, the vendor has a long rectangular table almost the same length as the two benches it comes with, one on each side and if you’re lucky it is in an enclosed space. They also have all sorts of names; “Chop Better”, “Auntie Salamatou Special Waakye” and the like

The joint which I frequent every other day at work has no name. The woman works with a team of about five or so girls. One who dishes out food with her, two to serve dishes and to make sure the eating area is clean, one to wash dishes and maybe a couple more in the kitchen. She sells plain rice with stew, boiled yam with kontomire stew, (also referred to as palava sauce), kokonte with palm-nut or groundnut soup and banku with okra stew. All these come with boiled eggs, fried fish, tuna, meat and more; whichever you’d like to have it.

Today, I spotted all sorts of relationship dynamics at the joint. Not that it is the first time, just not as much…

There was this girl at the stand when I arrived. She was skinny and dark and wore a slightly oversized straight dress. She smiled at me and politely asked me to go first. I didn’t know why but I did anyway. As I was placing my order, I saw a mechanic come up to her and ask her name. She said nothing; she just stared at him. Then he went on to ask for her phone number bringing out his phone; it needed a rubber band to keep its contents together. He received the scolding of his life. When the woman finished serving my dish, this same girl who was angered by the mechanic only seeking to know her name offered to carry my food to the table seeing as the girls who were supposed to take the food to the table were nowhere to be found. “It’s alright” I said, taking it myself. I wasn’t going to let any stranger near my food.

I walked into the eating area to meet this grey-haired black man. I know how that sounds almost racist. It isn’t supposed to be.


But this man was DARK; he was almost the same colour as the black trousers I was wearing. It was the first time I had run into him at the joint but he appeared to be a regular, considering he knew all the girls by name. He was trying to pick up one of them as I walked in. She was all giggly till I walked in. He also went silent almost immediately. He was seated strategically so he could see everything and everyone that would come in through the door. I sat to his right.

There was a guy sitting to my right; Very well kept dreadlocks, jeans, V-necked Tee Shirt, and if I had to guess his shades were of the same quality as the Chinese replica of the iPhone 6 he was holding. He kept staring at this girl who was seated on the other side of the table. She was totally clad in denim. She wasn’t dressed in tight jeans as is typical of today’s Ghanaian girl. She appeared kind of tomboyish to me. It was as if she had borrowed her brother’s clothes. but who cares what I thought. “beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder” they say. Or does “beauty lie in the ice of the ‘beer holder'” I thought to myself as he staggered after her neglecting to finish his boiled yam. I didn’t think that would go well though.

Before she took off, she had received a phone call. Her countenance changed the second she saw the number on the caller ID. “Yes, why are you calling me?” she demanded angrily. “I am coming” she hung up, kissed her teeth and continued eating her food. I guess the dreadlocked guy missed all that or was probably confident about his chances. I hadn’t finished my meal so I wasn’t going to follow them to see how it went.

Safe to say it went well..?

The dark old man to my left hadn’t given up on the girls though. He tried again, this time on the girl who was supposed to be doing the dishes. “How are we spending the Easter” he asked. “y3 b3 k) kwahu anaa?”. She ignored the question and laughed. She whispered something to the other girl and they burst out laughing. The old man dipped his hand back in his bowl and continued eating his abete3, which was cold by then.

I had had enough. Besides I had a couple of meetings to attend.

The question I keep asking myself is this. Does food create the aura of love or do people go to food joints seeking love?

Daily Trotro Occurrences II


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After i posted yesterday’s post. i got on a yet another trotro on my way home. This particular trotro was headed for Ashaiman where I was supposed to get off along the way and get yet another trotro to my final destination. For those of you who know or have heard about Ashaiman, its a place people fear to go even during the day how much more at night. But that didn’t trouble me at all.

What troubled me was this creep who wouldn’t take his eyes off my phone’s screen.

i mean, why was he staring at my screen and why wouldn’t he stop??

Occasionally, i would look up suddenly as if to check where we had reached on the journey. His head would IMMEDIATELY go up too. Kind of like when you’re staring at someone and simultaneously trying to avoid making eye contact. Exactly. His head came down almost as soon as mine did. i tried that a couple of times but to no avail.

i now turned off the screen and pocketed the phone. Phone kept beeping like crazy because I was chatting with quite a number of people at the same time. And every single time it beeped, he would look at me as if to say “charle, remove it and lets read la”

Eventually a phone call got me to bring the phone out again. After i hung up i decided to read the messages, Dude was still reading with me. but i was “unlooking”.

i decided to try one last resort..

I put the phone in my left hand; which was closer to him now. i got on twitter and typed.

Someone please advice this nigga to stop reading from my screen….

*he kept reading anyway* Second tweet:

Yes, I’m hoping you’ll see this and look away…

*he wasn’t perturbed*

As for what ensued with a friend on whatsapp after that, I’ll have to show you images….

SC20150320-095943-1     SC20150320-100425-1

After this I had given up on the creep.


Let’s just assume he was fascinated by the lights and watching my hands go….

Daily Trotro Occurences…


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Like the average Ghanaian, i frequently use the trotro and as a result I have had several trotro encounters. Some humorous others not so amusing. To those of you who may be wondering, “trotro” is the term by which most Ghanaians know the buses that ply our streets day and night, transporting passengers to and from their daily movements within the city. I just want to share briefly yesterday and today’s experiences.

So yesterday, the bus “loads” and takes off. A few minutes later on a journey that is supposed to last (give or take) an hour, a young man in the back remembers that he had left something at home and requests to get off. This he does without saying a word. The “mate” was also “unlooking” kraaa.

Barely 10 seconds later,

*exits mate’s head out the window in the usual trotro mate fashion* “Accra Accra Accra”

*the whole bus begins to protest*. “Wo nfa obiara o” “akwaa no atua ho ka dada” they all chorused.

So the people refused to let the new passenger on.

*The driver got angry and parked* “What is happening?” he demanded. The passengers told him that the mate charged the full fare from the other guy who had to get off so they wouldn’t let another person onto the bus. The  driver got mad at the mate, blah blah blah. Eventually we let the woman get on but we didn’t allow her to pay the fare. “After all, what is good for the goose is equally good for the gander” the gray-haired man sitting next to me tried to explain. “Why should the mate get to charge double for the same seat on the same journey” he rationalized.

*ASIDE* Just in case you were wondering, “mate” is our very own Ghanaian term for the conductor.

My friends from Europe and all those other places would be surprised about this. In Holland, London, etc., if you forgot something at home and you had to go back and get it, You had to wait for the next stop and hopefully catch the next tram or bus back home. DON’T DREAM ABOUT A REFUND. NOBODY CARES EVEN IF YOU GOT ON THE WRONG TRAM. As long as you got on, better pay your 3Euros and wait for the next stop.

But then again, these monies go to the government and they would be pumped back into the system so i guess its easy to overlook. The Ghanaian transport system is mostly private owned and these “extra monies” would make its way into an individual’s pocket.

In Ghana, people want a refund if they didn’t get to use the service for which they paid. Perhaps, if the mate had charged the fare from the station to the junction where he got off, there would have been no protests.

Today’s occurrence was both funny and annoying. It reminded me of that expression I learnt back in school. First time I heard it, i was in JSS

Your rights end where another’s begins! 

This young man, bless his heart, was sitting right behind me,on the back seat”. And like the pharisees, he prayed. He was LOUD. And he kept going on and on and on.

Let me say this, and in no uncertain terms that I, OSTWIN AWOLEBA ADDA, AM NOT AGAINST PRAYER IN ANY WAY WHATSOEVER.


it would amaze you if you took a poll on the bus. 99.9% of the people would be Christians but we were equally annoyed by this guys behavior. I’m pretty sure most of us said our prayers before leaving the house. This guys misconduct was just unacceptable. I have prayed in a bus on occasion, that is not the way to go. You don’t disturb everyone if you need to pray in public. Especially not early in the morning on a trotro full of people going to work and quietly making plans as they go. Personally I was reading a book and i didn’t appreciate the rude interruption.

Lets learn to respect ourselves wherever we may find ourselves.

ESPECIALLY ON THE TROTRO. You don’t have a clue the kind of person it is who is sitting next to you.


Have you had any unique trotro encounters lately..

Please Share…


Fear God


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Just the other day, there was a heavy downpour of rain. But that wasn’t what caught my attention.

What caught my attention was the WIND that accompanied the rain. Then there was the LIGHTNING as well as his noisy SCARY twin THUNDER.. I’m not talking about everyday wind. I mean WIND. The kind that made sure we slept in the dark yesterday (as electric poles came tumbling down) and a portion of our ceiling came off. Oh and just by the way the building was completed barely 3 months ago. I started to pray for Mercy. Hmmm.


My mind was drawn to that story in Exodus 19. Immediately, I grabbed my bible and read the story again. The Israelites, after being led by Moses out of Egypt into the wilderness of Sinai, had to go and meet God at the Mount of Sinai in order that the people of Israel would hear Him(God) speak.

The morning of the 3rd day of sanctification when God had commanded that the people come to the mount, there was lightning, thunder and a thick cloud upon the mount. And the voice of the trumpet was exceeding loud.

At this point in time the people were still in the camp but the Bible says the people TREMBLED…


This got me thinking.

You see, when it rains as heavily as it did yesterday, we get scared by common winds, lightning and the sound of thunder but we do not fear God as much. (LORD HAVE MERCY)

I don’t think my generation knows anything about the Fearfulness of God.

Just for God to come down and speak with His people, there had to be LIGHTNING, THUNDER and a THICK CLOUD on the mount. As if that wasn’t enough, the mount was SMOKING because the Lord descended on the mount in FIRE. And Bible says the smoke was as that of a furnace. And there was the long sounding trumpet that waxed louder and louder..

He asked Moses to set bounds for the mount because anyone (man or beast) who touched it would surely die.

God had initially asked Moses to sanctify the people BOTH on the first and second days. He also commanded that the people wash their clothes. He even commanded that husbands do not go at their wives…. Eiii!!!!

It wasn’t enough that people needed sanctification, even their clothes had to be washed before God could speak to them.

Today, we come into the church with all sorts of filth. We see church elders sleeping with young oblivious Christian sisters, we have choristers going to fornicate on Saturday night and yet showing up on Sunday morning and boldly mounting the stage in their short skirts to minister to God’s people, we have ushers/altar boys masturbating all night-through and then coming to hold around offering bags to receive the offerings of God’s holy people among all sorts of unspeakable things. We even hinder the presence of God from coming down because He(God) cannot be associated with anything unholy.


There was once a time when the ground would open and swallow up anyone who sinned INSTANTLY. There was no room for repentance.

Let us not let Jesus’s sacrifice be for naught.

You see, the God of yesterday hasn’t changed with the times.




He is still the same yesterday, today and forever and He STILL DEMANDS that we sanctify ourselves before coming to His presence.

Yes, We are in the dispensation of the Spirit and GRACE and MERCY abounds.

But as Paul said, the abundance of GRACE shouldn’t be an excuse to sin(paraphrased).


Let us Fear God.

All by my Lonesome


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A little boy loses his mum shortly after his dad is gone.
He moves in with an aunt who is too busy to accord him the attention he needs
He grows up not knowing happiness
With his parents passing, it was gone.

A young teenage girl gets dumped by her lover.
For a while, he had been the crux of her life.
She had shunned the old and failed to make new friends.
“Who needs friends when they’re in love”, she would tell herself.
With his going, she was left sad and alone.

A mother loses the father of her child.
He was everything to her;
A loving father, a confidant, leader, friend, lover and satisfaction.
*moment of silence*
Their 3 year old keeps asking; “mummy, where is daddy?”
“You’ll see him soon”, she replies, turns the other way and sheds a tear.

A rich man with many friends begins to face some difficulty.
He turns to some of his friends for help and realizes there is no one supporting him.
He has to struggle all by himself to make ends meet.
Difficulty revealed that he actually had no friends.

When Jesus hung on the cross for you and I,
He had taken up our nature of sin;
So that by dying and resurrecting we might be reborn with Christ.
But God is a just and righteous God and CANNOT be associated with sin.
For the first (and perhaps last) time, “the holy trinity” was broken for mankind’s sake.
“Father, Father, why has thou forsaken me”, Jesus cried.

God’s whole plan for creating man is FELLOWSHIP.
But it is CLEAR that salvation is a one-man affair.

It is appointed for a man to die once and after death judgement.

“Work out your salvation with fear and trembling”,
the bible says.
Make sure you’re ready when your time comes.

When The Master calls me home,
I will be by my lonesome 
And so will you.

FAÇADE; A Prologue…


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“A good boy is a bad boy that hasn’t been caught”

A young boy sits in an exam hall
Within his self-built ignorance wall
Everybody but himself is busy writing
With the fear of failure heightening,
He giraffes.

A young girl cheats on her boyfriend for money
She is no longer satisfied by just being called “honey”
She desires the taste of actual honey
She finds a sugar daddy.
They sneak into a hotel room

A preacherman says to his congregation. “Be not drunk but be filled with the spirit.”
But he himself is a slave to alcohol.
He keeps a vodka-laced bottle of water in his jacket.
As he reaches for the inner pocket,
He looks around for familiar faces.

A cash-starved young man acquires a gun
And he waits for the setting of the sun.
He shoots an old shopkeeper in the head
Without uttering a word,
He empties the cash register and flees

Man might not catch you
But God has his HD camcorder on you.
He captures your every move.
Don’t only look left and right before you do wrong.
Look up too…


La Premiere Fois que Je t’ai Vu.


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That 1st time I saw you.
I thought to myself as you walked by. “What a beauty!!”
I met you later that evening at the “Orange Party”
I wasn’t going to come, but I knew you’d be there.
I smiled at you and you smiled right back.
Mon cœur à tombe dans mon ventre
Somewhere in your smile, I forgot where I was
I looked in your green eyes and asked:
“Is that the real colour of your eyes?”
“What do you think”, you replied.
I really did not know what I was thinking.
I had lost my ability to reason.
In your presence I had failed to rediscover myself
Later I would ask myself:
“Dude, are you ok?”
“Get your act together” I chided on occasion.
One day, the fire alarm went off
As we exited the building, I caught a glimpse of you
There you stood on the lawn in your native apparel.
At this point I was toast.
I didn’t say a word, I only reached for my camera
As I got it in position, you started posing.
We were in total sync.

I had even forgotten about what was important
At least until my mother drew my attention. (Bless her heart)
“Is she a Christian?”
I was glad to find out that you are.
As I looked some more at your images, I began to notice the Potter’s handiwork.
He paid a lot of attention to the details.
Femme Africaine, tu es si belle.
The more I interacted with you, the more I couldn’t get you out of my head.
Indeed, your speech is seasoned with salt.
I started calling you “mon ange”.
Because, tu as l’air d’une princesse.

Albeit 2000miles later, I had begun to reason again.
I tried to convince myself to let go:
“Dude, you’re daydreaming;
She is in a world of her own”
I don’t know what we’ll do about this
But I had to let you know.

La Première fois que je t’ai vu.



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Daily, our bodies feed

At the very neglect of our soul’s vital need.

Thus the body enjoys rapid growth

While the spirit suffers stagnant growth



The body is now a giant

And the Spirit, merely a midget

Simply because we yearn for bread

When all we truly need is the word.



Now, all we seek is signs and wonders

And for this reason, one wanders;

Hopping from church to church

Yearning for many a pastors’ touch.



AS A RESULT, we have imbibed false doctrine.

Things not even fit to be in a latrine.

We believe and live by them…

We even defend them





Study to show yourself approved!

Trust me; your life will be improved!

A Restoration of Equilibrium!

A Facade


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That frontal appearance

Yes! that one behind which one is

Where he is himself

Where he speaks freely

He thinks not twice before speaking

Because, there, he is “covered”

Where he fools around,

And yet protects his image, that “outside image”.

Here he portrays the 2nd and/or 3rd of his multiple personalities.

“The world shall never know”, he tells himself.

But in reality, it is a smokescreen

Maame once said, “Suban te s3 nyins3n”

It is bound to reveal itself…

Then the world will see it for what it really is

A façade.